Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Withdrawal Symptoms

I was just thinking what I missed the most from my last relationship and oddly, I missed the comfortable silences. The silence which I thought spoke volumes. I miss the moment when I could just snuggle and feel safe and warm. I haven't felt that in months. But why am I feeling like this now? Why am I letting myself think of the past which is so obviously irrevocable?

For the past one week I have been dreading the coming days. I have a good reason, I'm going to become older by another year. Not something pleasant to look forward to. Until I was 21 I loved all my birthdays, particularly the gifts and party with friends. But now its like a date which only makes me older and none the more wiser. Its like now I'm racing with time to make something out of life. For the past 2 years its been the same; I sulk and shy away from my close friends and company. Last year one of my closest friends had to force herself to my place and wish me. This year too I'd love to run away to be with myself but I have College to attend. Thankfully I have taken leave from work for that day. I think the Best Friend wants to do something for my birthday but I have forewarned him of my plans. Lets see what happens this time around :-|

As frustrating as it is to my friends and me I still want to be alone this time too.

Sigh...

Listening to James Blunt's "You're Beautiful" and hating him for bringing a rush of bittersweet memories :'(

15 comments:

Ricky said...

You can run but you can't hide. When I am coming there, we are celebrating your birthday again....why? Because after meeting me, you will become wiser na :P

The song you have chosen suits you perfect to the T.

The Bhandari's said...

Wish you a very happy birthday :)
Will read your post in few minutes and then comment on it.
~Preeti

Ricky said...

Happy Birthday Marleeeeeeeeeeee !!

Where's my share of cake? :D

Sudipta Chatterjee said...

Hey, thanks for dropping into my blog! And of course, (belated?) birthday wishes :)

About the post: we all learn a lot from past relationships. But the idea is to learn, not to brood and stay put. And celebrate your birthday, yaar... imagine all the bright moments you spent the last year and all the cool moments to come! :)

AmitL said...

Hey,Marlee...I guess all of us feel this way,at some time or the other.But,then,believe me,it's always best to live for the present.So,let the birthday be a time for happiness,rather than moping/feeling sad.

Just think of your achievements in the past and your goals for the future,and,make a list of things you want to achieve in the coming year.

And,oh,yes,many happy returns of the day.

a_n_u_r_a_g said...

..and I thought only I was a cynic! B'day was just another day with a few more phone calls to receive. Getting pensive is an option I never thought of exploring somehow

khukii said...

hey marlee long tym no new post..hope evrything alright..?..loved this post f urs too..somehw i cn relate to it..

khukii said...

oh by the way happy birthday..!

Syed Siddique Sharaf said...

it happens sometimes. occasionally it happened with me to :). keep hope.
waise i cam to ur blog through orkut 'don bosco,diphu' communty. studied there long back :)

anks said...

hi... so, did you manage to stay alone on ur b'day???

AmitL said...

Hi,Marlee...wishing you a very happy Diwali and a Dazzling New Year!When's the next post?

Ricky said...

Can you remind me why are you not posting these days??

Marlee said...

@ Ricky: Wiser? Hmmmm...watever...
Song? now ur sounding weird! :-P

@ The Bhandari's: Thanks for the sweet wishes :)

@ Ricky: Thank you Thank you! Cake? I ate it up! :-D

@ Sudipta Chatterjee: Thanks for the wishes!

@ Amitl: Thanks for the suggestion, should try it out. And thanks for the bday wishes!

@ a_n_u_r_a_g: Lol, Dont even try it then! :-D

@ Khukii: Yes, everything's alright just been very busy with work, college n exmas! Thanks for the concern and the bday wishes!

@ Syed: Don Bosco? How nice! I studied there yrs ago as well. Wat yrs did u study there?

@ Anks: No, Anks I wasn't alone for my bday. The best fren was thetre along with a few other frens.

@ Amitl: Thanks for the wishes...next post in a few minutes.

@ Ricky: Ricky!!! :-O I'm busy relaxing these days...um...just beofre the exams? YESSSS! :-P

Nwgwt said...

Hey B'Lated Happy Birthday. I loved ur writing. Keep it up

Marlee said...

@ nwgwt: Hi, welcome to my Blog! Thanks for the bday wishes and compliments :-)